Save Raven
by Morbid Original
Summary: Raven is deathly injured during a fight and doesn't heal herself because she would rather die than fulfil her 'destiny'.Saving her could mean preventing the end of the Earth. [RobxRae][COMPLETE!]
1. Kill Her

**This is my first Fan Fic ever, so... Okay then! But I am the ultimate Master (Mistress, w/e) of Teen Titans. Trust me, I know _everything_ about them. Lol!**

**Oh, and there are also poems after each chapter, but the story makes more sense if you read the poems too. Okay, so... read!**

Chapter One: Torn

"Titans, go!"

Somewhere in east Jump City, in an old, rundown warehouse filled with rotted, wooden crates and boxes from years past, the Teen Titans...

"Look out!"

Starfire turned toward Beast Boy. _Look out for wh-?_

There was a crash. She screamed, then lay unconscious under bits of broken wood and twisted metal.

"Starfire!" Robin cried, fending off a blow.

What were these _things_ they were fighting? They were tall, slim creatures. And brittle. Their faces featureless, their arms long, their nails sharper than swords. They walked noisily on the dusty concrete floor; their sharp spikes screeching against the walls like fingernails on a chalkboard.

They swung again at Robin, three of them. The other four were gathering up Cyborg, Beast Boy, and Raven against the wall, surrounding them.

"Uh, guys?" Beast Boy said, looking around. "Any suggestions?"

Robin pushed past the monsters with his bow-staff, then froze them. Aiming another freeze disk at the four surrounding his friends. Two remained. Starfire emerged from under the broken crates and shot at the lank creatures, but their metal-like shell reflected the starbolts' blows to Robin. He received the shots intended for the monsters and fell against the far wall, groaning.

"Robin!" Starfire cried, flying toward him, only to be blocked by one of the creatures who had thawed already.

A blast of blue light flared across the room as Cyborg's cannon was reflected off of the beasts. He turned his gaze to the young woman cloaked in dark blue beside him against the wall.

"Raven, a little help?"

She nodded.

Stepping away from the wall a little, she raised her hands straight out in front of her; closing her eyes, she muttered her spell: "Azarath Metrion Zinthos!" Her voice becoming louder. She pulled her right arm back toward her chest and her left arm above her head; on the last word of the spell, she pushed her arms in front of her again, her palms emitting her powerful black energy. Four creatures flew back against the wall, hitting it with a sickening crack as their metal being was crushed against the hard concrete.

Robin looked around. Two of the creatures were still frozen. Four of them were crushed.

_Wait a minute…_ _There's only six here…_

"Raven, look out!" he screamed. Too late.

Raven gasped as the one remaining monster loomed up from the darkness. Before anything could be done, it slashed out with its rusted, metallic claws and sunk them into Raven's chest. It twisted and yanked at the flesh and tissue, blood flowing out. She screamed and masses of black energy zapped at every corner, blood-stained tears of pain streaming down her face. The beast slashed out with its other clawed hand, catching the skin just beneath her ear, her neck. Unconsciousness took over Raven, the victim. The beast, still entangled in Raven's bloody tissue, froze. Robin hooked his remaining freeze disks to his belt again and ran over to the grotesque feature.

Raven's body was hanging limply from the frozen creature by a few strands of muscle and tissue, all covered in crimson blood. Robin untangled her from the monster and gently laid her down. He knelt beside her, a solemn expression on his face.

"Bring the car around," he ordered in a voice unlike any that his friends had heard before. He was quiet. He looked calm. But the torture concealed inside of him seemed to claw and slash at his heart and mind just as the beast had at Raven. He resisted the sick, churning feeling in his stomach. He of all people had to remain at least seemingly under control.

Cyborg brought the car to the front of the warehouse where the police, an ambulance, and many onlookers stood. Beast Boy was talking to some of the doctors. He came over to Robin, who was still with Raven inside the warehouse.

"Hey, I told them Rae was hurt. They really think she should go to the hospital."

Robin looked up at Beast Boy, a disbelieving look on his face. Disbelieving and angry.

"Raven's coming with us," he snapped.

"Really, dude, we don't know anything about this! And she…" he sighed. "She's not healing herself, man."

"Beast Boy is right," Starfire said gently. She had stayed with Raven as well. "Raven needs help. And Robin, we cannot give it to her." She looked at him sadly.

Beast Boy spoke again. "Maybe we can get somebody to come to the Tower."

Robin nodded. Beast Boy looked down at the stained, distorted mess that was his friend. He winced. The beast had torn at her neck and breast fiercely. The remaining flesh lay in tangles and knots, almost disconnected from the body.

"I'm gonna go ask now," Beast Boy said, and started for the exit.

Minutes later, a few people came in with a stretcher. Robin lifted the body onto it and walked beside it out the door. Police sirens deafened him and blue, white, and red lights flashed before him.

Cyborg walked up to Robin and Starfire as they started for the ambulance. "What's going on?"

Beast Boy came over to them. "They said they could come to the Tower until we could take over," he said, a bit out of breath from running back and forth between the Titans and the ambulance and the paramedics.

Robin nodded. "I'll ride with them," he said, nodding his head toward the ambulance.

"A'ight."

The team drove off, followed by the ambulance. Destination: Titans' Tower. Mission: Save Raven.

Torn: Poems  
(Raven – while it's happening)  
It looms before me  
It came out from the dark  
It waits not a second  
Its bite is worse than its bark  
With claws so ragged  
And intention to kill  
It shoots out and attacks  
With only one will  
It's going to kill me  
I'm going to die  
I feel it sink in  
It twists me, I cry  
But you do not help me  
You all stand there and wait  
Because this isn't how I'm supposed to die  
This isn't supposed to be my fate  
Yet this would be kinder  
Than destroying the world  
Serving under my father  
Daddy's little girl  
That's why I give in  
That's why I don't try  
If I was meant to kill  
Why shouldn't I die?  
It yanks even harder  
It gashes my neck  
Then there's black all around me  
The final affect  
I can feel nothing  
Emotion nor pain  
Yet my heart is still beating  
I will wake again

For you that are confused, this explains the poem:

Raven is being attacked by the creature, and she thinks that the rest of the Titans aren't going to help her because they know she isn't going to die then. Raven is destined to destroy mankind and Earth; that's her father's prophecy. She lets the monster hurt her because she thinks it would be better for her to die than to end up destroying the earth and serving her father. But, of course, she doesn't die. She just blacks out. Now she has to wait and see if she will end up destroying the earth for her father.

FYI: Trigon, Raven's father, is a demon. Watch EPISODE 6, SEASON 1 "Nevermore" for more on Trigon.

AND: If you want more on Raven's 'destiny', watch EPISODE 3, SEASON 4 "Birthmark".


	2. Help Her

Okay, my bad, but the first chapter was supposed to be called "Kill Her". Sorry!

Chapter 2: Help Her

Things were quiet in the tower for the next few weeks. Nothing really seemed to happen. Or to improve. Day and night the infirmary door was kept locked. No one was allowed inside except the paramedics, for health reasons. They didn't want Raven infected with anything. The Titans hadn't seen Raven at all. Occasional updates about her condition from doctors and nurses every now and then, but nothing really… _reassuring_.

_A scream. Sirens. Lights. Faces. A crowd. The hum of an engine. Footsteps. The steady, rthyamic beeping of machines. Beating of her heart. The blood…_

Robin woke with a start from the nightmare. One of the many he had had since the fight at the warehouse. He looked at the clock on the far wall of his bedroom. "Fuck," he muttered, hurrying out of bed and into his uniform. It was 5 minutes to midnight. He had almost missed it.

**(Flashback – Earlier that day)**

"…**Other than that, she's doing pretty well."**

"Okay, thanks. Keep us posted," Robin said as the doctor's image faded from the TV screen in the Titans' living room. He sighed and fell back on the couch. Another vague, 2-minute update on Raven.

"That is it!" Starfire whined from across the room. "But that was not all!"

"We know, Star, but that's all they can give us right now," Cyborg sighed.

"But that cannot be all they know! We must see her!" she pleaded coming up to Cyborg.

Robin turned to face them. "We will, Starfire. Just give it some time," he said, irritated. Starfire floated over to him as he turned away again.

"It has been time!" she yelled, her eyes glowing. "It has been nearly three Mfrenacs and we have heard almost nothing as to if our friend will even survive. She could be at rest even now and we have heard nothing!"

Robin stood bolt upright and glared at Starfire.

"Don't even say that!"

Starfire's eyes dimmed down to normal, and she lowered her head and backed away. Robin stormed out of the room and rounded the corner, walking quickly to… he didn't know. But he _had_ to get out of there. There was too much tension. But inside, he knew Starfire was right. They weren't being told everything.

_But why would they…_

His thoughts were cut off as he almost walked straight into a nurse. A girl with tan skin and dirty blond hair, wearing a white uniform.

"Sorry, uh, Marie," Robin said, glancing at her nametag.

Marie smiled wanly. "No problem, uh, Robin," she said sarcastically. Then her face grew serious. "You guys are pretty rung up about the girl, huh?"

"Raven."

"Right."

"Yeah, we are."

There was a tense silence between them until Robin finally spoke.

"When can we see her?"

Marie didn't answer right away. Then quietly: "We don't know."

Robin sighed. "But she's healing herself," he said.

"No, she won't," Marie muttered sadly. Robin looked at her, confused. Marie inhaled deeply.

"She wants to die."

Another pause.

"What?"

Marie sighed, looking uneasy.

"She wants to-"

"I heard what you said. Why?" Robin snapped, worry showing as anger and frustration in his voice.

"I don't know," Marie said quietly. Then she looked Robin straight in the eye and muttered, half-way to herself: "But we think you can help."


	3. Love Her

Chapter 3: Love Her

**(Continued Flashback)**

Robin raised an eyebrow (A/N: mask, w/e). "Excuse me?"

"Look," Marie began. "There are two things that can happen tomorrow: one, Raven could die," she continued before Robin could speak, "And two, she could heal herself."

"And exactly what event decides which of those happens?" Robin asked, frustrated along with everything else.

"You," Marie stated simply.

Robin rolled his eyes. (A/N: MASK! grrr!w/ the f /e!)

"No, really!" Marie insisted, a look of determination on her face.

"Just convince her!"

"To what!"

"To heal herself!"

Robin scoffed doubtingly. "And what exactly makes you think that _I_ can change her mind? I don't even know why she wants to die!"

"Yes, you do. You know more than we do, anyway," Marie sighed.

"But why me?"

"Because she loves you!"

For a moment, Robin said nothing. Then…

"What!"

Marie sighed. "Because she loves you."

"But… how did you-"

"She talks in her sleep," Marie cut him off. "She says your name."

"That doesn't necessarily mean-"

"Well, it means something. And that's all we've got. So either you break down and except it and help her, or she dies tomorrow, as soon as the sun rises."

For a moment no one spoke.

"I'd get to see her, though. Tonight," Robin said, still taking in what Marie had said. _She… She actually...? No way..._

Marie nodded. "Tonight at midnight. That's the only time you could see her alone."

**(End Flashback)**


	4. Kiss Her

Chapter 4: Kiss Her

Robin walked quietly through the hall, his heart beating rapidly. Not only was he going to _see_ Raven for the first time in nearly a month, but she was also _in love with him_. Or so he had heard. And so he hoped.

He rounded a corner and nearly ran into Marie again.

"I gotta stop doing that," he scoffed, rolling his eyes.

Marie smirked. "I was just coming to get you."

"I'm not that late, am I?" he asked, somewhat worriedly.

Marie rolled her eyes. "Not yet. You've got less than three hours to sunrise," she said, and turned to a door behind her. The infirmary. She punched in a code on a panel on the wall and the door opened. She stood back.

"It's up to you."

"Yeah, no pressure," Robin sighed and stepped inside.

It was cold. Tense. It was like nothing good came into this room, and you were lucky if something good came out.

To his left, behind a curtain, Robin heard something move. He moved slowly toward it, pulling back the curtain and revealing…

"Raven," he said as calmly as he could, though he couldn't help smiling at the sight of her face.

Raven looked up. "Hi. What are you doing here? If you get caught-"

"No, no, I'm here with… permission," Robin said, the words leaving his mouth before he could stop them. _Oh my God, I probably sound like an idiot… but, oh well…_

He sat down in a chair beside the small bed were Raven lay.

"Uh, are you okay?" Robin asked, looking her over. She looked almost the same except for some black and purple-ish gashes around her ear and neck; and the fact that she held a blanket over the left side of her chest told Robin that the doctors hadn't been able to 'heal her' so that she looked exactly as she used to. But none of it looked deadly. Marie had said she was going to die unless she healed herself. _But she doesn't look like she's about to- Oh my fucking God…_

Raven leaned back against the pillow, her head tilted slightly upward. By her jaw, there was a large hole. Not a gash, literally a hole. Robin could see straight into her mouth farther. From where the beast had held her, one long, titanium claw had shot straight through head, into her brain, causing her to black out. It was then Robin realized she couldn't move. Just from her neck up. Neck down, she was completely paralyzed. _That thing must've ruptured something in her brain… Holy shit…_

Raven looked down again.

"Sorry," she said quickly. "I keep forgetting…"

"It's f-fine," Robin stuttered, still shocked.

Raven's expression darkened.

"I guess they already told you I'm gonna die, huh?"

Robin shook his head. "Only me."

Raven frowned, confused. Then it hit her.

"Robin, I-"

"Raven, why do you want to die?"

She didn't answer.

"Raven, please," Robin sighed, putting his hand on her shoulder, though he doubted she could feel it. "Look, I know how this sounds, but if you're going to die in a few hours anyway, you may as well tell me."

Sorrow enveloped her eyes; more than usual, anyway. She nodded solemnly.

"My destiny."

"Your what? Oh, Raven, that…that stupid 'prophecy'? Oh, God, like that's even going to happen."

"It will happen," Raven snapped, then sunk farther back into the pillow. "He's back, Robin. My father's back. He's the one who brought back Slade."

"I know. I know. But that doesn't mean you should just… give up," Robin said helplessly, searching for the right words.

"Raven, I know you think that your life doesn't count for anything, but trust me when I say it does."

Raven scoffed. "Please, Robin. You know very well that my life hasn't counted for anything since even before my birth."

"Rae, in case you haven't noticed, you're the only one in existence who thinks that! Raven, do you really think you're alone in the world? 'Cause if you do, that's our fault. Everyone has been worried _sick_ about you! And not just the Titans; the entire, God-forsaken _city_ is worried about you!"

"Okay, okay. I get it. But think about it, Robin; give me _one reason_ why I should live?"

Robin got up from the chair and knelt just beside Raven.

"Just _one_ reason?" Raven nodded, not sure where this was going.

"Okay," Robin said nonchalantly. Then he leant forward and kissed her.


	5. Wake Her

Chapter 5: Wake Her

I'm sitting in the middle of darkness. Around me, nothing moves. Nothing breathes. Nothing is alive. I'm not even sure if I'm alive. I'm not breathing, I don't think. I don't blink or move. I just sit on my knees, staring at things I cannot see. And I wait. There is no wind. There is no air. There is no water. Only fire and ashes and dust. And remains of what used to be. And then the creatures come. Only one creature. The only one left. Tall, thin. Metalic. Featureless. Grey. With its long claws dangling at its sides. And that sickly, screeching noise that I cannot hear but know is there. It disappears behind a wall of smoke. Smoke which was caused by me. Myself. I caused this chaos. It was I who set fire to each individual house and building. It was I who took the lives of mankind. And of Earth. It is I who shall continue this destruction. Spreading it from world to world. After all, that's why I'm here. To follow in the footsteps of My Father. My Master. And in the end, when all that He wished done has been done, I suppose He'll kill me. I blink for the first time in hours. I shift slightly, as if to see if I can still move. Slowly I stand up and look around. There is nothing left. I have completed my task. Will He kill me now? The sky is a smoky grey and black. And red. The shape of four red eyes in the middle of the greying sky. "Will You kill me now?" "Yes."

Raven sat bolt upright in her plain, makeshift bed. Breathing heavily, looking around. The infirmary. She was only in the infirmary. Over night, reality had not transformed into the living hell she knew was her future. Her destiny. Her breathing slowed, but she did not relax. Her eyes moved slowly around the room, making sure nothing had changed. She looked at the digital clock on the small table beside her bed. 4:00 AM. She gave a sigh of relief, untensing her body. It was only a dream. She eased herself back against the pillow. Waiting for morning.

The paramedics had left a few days before. The day Raven was _supposed_ to die, but then changed her mind and healed herself. Or rather, _Robin_ changed her mind and _insisted_ she heal herself.

_Oh God, don't think about Robin _now, she thought. She looked at the clock again. 4:01. She rolled her eyes. _And what am I gonna do for the next three hours?_

Then her communicator stared beeping. She flipped it open.

"Yeah?"

"Hey, Raven."

It was Robin.

"Hey."

"Sorry, I know it's early. I just…"

"It's fine. I was awake anyway."

The smile faded off Robin's face. "You had another dream again, didn't you?"

Raven nodded. "Don't worry about it," she said, seeing the concerned look on his face. "I'll be fine."

"Well, okay. If you're sure." (A/N: OMG, I know that is such a cheesy line, but Robin says it all the time so, sux 4 him. Lol)

For a moment, no one spoke.

"Uh, Rae, you know what you have to do today, right?"

Raven raised an eyebrow. "Um, no."

Robin sighed, amused. "Raven, you're going to see the other Titans today. Your doctor said you were well enough by now to get off your lazy ass."

"Okay, he so did not say 'get off my ass'."

"No, but you get the idea."

Raven scowled, picturing all the attention she'd get, and how she'd be crushed in all of Starfire's hugs, and how uncomfortable and awkward she'd be, and…

Robin seemed to read her mind.

"Hey, it's better today than tomorrow. You've been gone long enough, and if we make them wait any longer, they'll just be all the more ecstatic to see you," he said.

Raven sighed. "Fine."

The color in Robin's face deepened for a moment.

"And Rae, we're gonna have to tell them about… us."

_Oh God…_, Raven thought, her jaw dropping slightly and her eyes widening.

"Oh fuck, didn't think of that."

"Yeah, me neither."

They paused.

"So… how should we tell them?" Robin asked.

Raven thought for a minute, then shrugged.

"I dunno. Maybe we could just… _not_ tell them, but not _hide_ it, or anything. Let them figure it out."

"Yeah, good idea. I'll be up in a minute."

"Kay."

Raven flipped her communicator shut and placed it on the bedside table and got out of bed. She straightened her long, silk nightdress. Black, of course; long-sleeved and skin-tight. She started for the door on her right which led into a bathroom. The door shut behind her and she turned to face the wide mirror that took up most of the wall in the bathroom. Her brush lay beside the sink, where it had been for the past few weeks. She picked it up and slowly ran it through her hair, watching her reflection. And it watched her back.

_It's watching me_, she thought, a feeling of panic ran down her spine. _What…_

She screamed.


	6. Wake Her pt 2

Chapter 6: Wake Her (pt. II)

"Raven!"

Robin slammed the door open.

"Oh God, Raven." He knelt beside the trembling figure that sat against the wall of the infirmary bathroom. She stared unblinkingly up at the mirror, breathing heavily.

_She's hyperventilating_, Robin thought, alarmed.

"Raven, I heard you scream. Are you alright?"

She didn't answer. Or move.

Robin brushed her hair off her face. "Raven, it's okay," he said gently, helping her stand. Her breathing began to slow. She looked at Robin as though trying to remember who he was; where she'd seen him before.

She opened her mouth as if to speak, but Robin hushed her.

"It's okay. Everything's gonna be fine," he said, slowly pulling her into a hug. "It's okay." _I just wish I knew what was wrong in the first place…_

"Are you ready?"

Raven looked at Robin. They were standing in the hall outside the living room, where the other Titans were aimlessly going about their own business, awaiting their promised 'surprise' from Robin. They had no idea that that 'surprise' was Raven.

"Will I _ever_ be ready?"

Robin smirked. "Good enough." He kissed her quickly and opened the door, (A/N: automatic/button-open door, w/ the freak /e) Nobody turned to look when the door opened, though.

Giving Raven a smile of reassurance, Robin put his arm around her waist and led Raven to the center of the room. He cleared his throat to get their friends' attention.

"Uh, guys?"

They were all sitting on the couch and Beast Boy was flicking semi-consciously through the channels. (A/N:5 million channels and nothing to watch. Hate it when that happens…)

They turned to Robin and their jaws dropped.

For a moment, they couldn't speak. Then:

"Oh… my…freakin'…God…" Beast Boy muttered.

Starfire shot up from the couch and flew over to Raven and, of course, hugged the God-forsaken life outta her.

"Oh, Raven! You are well! We have missed you like a Knarfca would his Ooglflask! Tell me, where have you been?"

"Um, the infirmary," Raven said, a little short of breath. Starfire released her.

"Rae! How ya been?" Cyborg asked. Cutting off her answer, a green bloodhound bounded up to her and jumped on her, knocking her to the ground.

"Beast Boy… OFF! AND STOP SNIFFING ME!"

Cyborg pulled him off, giving him a questioning look. Beast Boy turned back into… well, himself.

"Sorry, I was just making sure the Evil Ice Aliens from Planet Crovthask hadn't sucked out your liver."

Raven raised an eyebrow as Robin helped her up.

Cyborg rolled his eyes. "BB's done some 'thinking' and he's supposedly diagnosed those… whatever-they-were-that-did-that-to-you… as some monsters from a comic book he read like, six years ago."

"Seven years ago," Beast Boy corrected.

"Why am I not surprised…" Raven muttered.

Suddenly, Starfire flew up behind her and screamed at the top of her lungs, "Bjognidals!"

Raven jumped, startled, and turned to face Starfire. She was wearing a long blue… something… well, it looked like a sort of coat, but it had giant holes everywhere, (you could see her uniform under it), and it had a long train in the back. It looked like it was made of some kind of fur. Blue fur. Yeah, not from Earth.

"Buh-hog-nah… what?" Beast Boy asked.

"It means 'Joyous Return'. It is the Tamaranian celebration of welcome! Welcome Raven, from your time apart from your friends!" Starfire said, smiling like no other.

They just stared at her (Starfire). Then Cyborg broke the silence. "Well, this calls for waffles!" He ran over to the kitchen.

"Oh, no you don't! TOFU waffles. TO-FU!" Beast Boy called and hurried after him.

"Come on, there's no meat in waffles!"

"I shall make the traditional Bjognidals Prfatscognidits!"

The three of them ran over to the other side of the living room where the 'kitchen' was.

Raven sighed, relieved that the worst was over, and sat down on the couch with Robin beside her.

"Well, that wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be," he whispered so the other Titans couldn't hear.

Raven rolled her eyes. "That makes one of us." She gave Robin a small smile then turned her gaze away from his.

She looked wearily around the room. It didn't feel as 'right' as she thought it would to be 'back'. She knew she had only been like, just down the hall, but it had been almost two months since she had even left the infirmary. She didn't really know what she had expected it to be like being 'back' again, but she felt somewhat let down. Everyone had been excited to see her, what more could she want? Or expect? She just had the feeling that after that day, everything would go back to normal; BB and Cy doing their thing, fooling around. Starfire being her normal sweet self; somewhat flirty around Robin. That was it. Robin. He had been with Raven a lot since the day he convinced her to save herself. And from that day on, Raven had felt he was sort of like… _her_ Robin. After today, would he go back to being… just _Robin_? Would he forget he said he loved her and maybe start to fall for Starfire again? He claimed he had never really 'loved' Starfire, but… Raven wouldn't blame him. And then… well, what would happen to the point of saving herself in the first place?

Robin could tell she was worrying. About… okay, he didn't know what. He wrapped his arm around her waist (again).

"What's wrong?"

For a moment, Raven didn't answer. Then she turned and looked him in the eye.

"Robin, you said you loved me. Do you-"

"Of course," Robin cut her off. "I love you," he said, lowering his voice.

"I love you too," Raven said, leaning on him, resting her head on his shoulder. She closed her eyes for a moment. He did love her; she could sense it. But he could't help her. And what had happened that morning…

_He was too late_, Raven thought, remembering what she had seen in the mirror.

_Fate_

_The future_

My Destiny He cannot stop it. He promised he would, but he can't. Only I can. Only I can…

(Raven)  
Realization

I'm lying in your arms

As realization dawns

I know now you can't help me

I wish now that I'd gone

There's too much complication

In explaining how I feel

I know you said you love me

I hope now it's not real

For without you there'd be nothing

Not one reason for me to stay

And then I could leave peacefully

It wouldn't have to be **that way**

I know there's much to think about

I know there's much to say

Other than what will happen

On that fateful day

But I cannot draw my mind from it

I can't for a moment forget

For in that single moment

_It_ may happen yet

I'm sitting in my room

As realization fades

I sit and count the hours

Until the end of day

It's supposed to be my birthday

You'd think it would be fun

But what you do not know is

Something Evil has begun

I wish I could just love you

Without the worry in my heart

But for me, it isn't easy

It's like wading in the dark

I don't know what will happen

On this my sixteenth year

**I cannot promise life in vain**

**But only out of fear**

Explaination:

Raven understands that Robin can't prevent what is supposed to happen. Only she can determine her 'destiny'. When she says '**that way**' she obviously means her destiny, the prophecy. She says she can't stop thinking about it, though she wishes she could. She's afraid that if she lets her guard down for one moment, that may be the moment when her father strikes. And again there were only two main reasons she healed herself: 1-Robin loves her and vice versa; 2-he said he would prevent what was supposed to happen. Well, #2 is pretty much zilched, but Raven won't leave yet because reason #1 is still valid (Lol, hate that word). Part of her wishes Robin didn't love her, so she could just 'leave'. (AKA die, for those of you who are really slow.) She's basically split between wanting to live and die, so really she's no better off than she was when she was injured.

In the second paragraph (stanza, w/e) it's basically a BIRTHMARK thing again. She wants to love Robin, but her constant worry/fear of the prophecy is sort of in the way. Now Raven's worried about how Robin feels on top of everything else. The '**I cannot promise life in vain But only out of fear**' can mean a lot of things. Plus, it sounds really cool. (I just kind of randomly thought it up) Think about what you think it means (and let me know, lol). When I wrote it I thought Raven was just saying/thinking she didn't really know if she chose to live because there was hope or just because she was too scared to die or scared she would die for nothing (like if her 'destiny' didn't happen after all) Write me at with your interpretation of **I cannot promise life in vain But only out of fear**'.

Thanks/ Sorry for the wait,

Bowan'arrowchick


	7. Free Her

Chapter 7: Free Her

Raven glanced at the clock on her bedside table. 1:43 AM. Her first night back in her own bed, and she wasn't getting much sleep. Partial to the fact that for the past two months, practically all she'd done was sleep; and also, she was waiting for Robin.

A knock at the door.

_Finally._

"Hey." He stepped into her room; she closed the door behind him.

He smiled at her.

"They figured it out already," he said.

"What?"

"Beast Boy and Cyborg. They asked me about 'us'."

Raven blushed. "Oh. You told them?"

Robin nodded. "You said that-"

"Yeah," Raven cut him off. "No problem."

Robin smiled, then pulled her to him and hugged her.

Raven closed her eyes. _Would you really rather be _dead_ now_? she thought, though her answer wasn't nearly what she'd call 'comforting'.

They broke apart and Raven sat down on her bed. Robin came and stood beside her.

"Are you glad to be back?" he asked, as if reading her mind.

At first, Raven said nothing. Then she nodded.

He sighed.

"I was afraid of that," he said. He bent over so he was eye to eye with Raven.

"Look, Raven, I can _help_ you. I won't let that happen. I swear."

Raven lowered her head as Robin sat down beside her. He put his arm around her.

"Raven, trust me. I won't let it happen."

"Get out."

"What?"

He tried to look her in the eye, but she was turned away from him.

"I said get out!"

"Raven, what's-"

"Just leave! Leave me alone!" As Raven turned to face him, Robin almost expected to see the usual four glowing, red eyes she grew when she was angry; but no; she was crying. She was trying to look angry, but she was crying.

"Raven, it's okay; calm down."

She stood up.

"No! Just GET OUT!" LEAVE! NOW!" she yelled at him, her voice somewhat shaky from her crying.

"Raven!" Robin stood and held up his hands like he wasn't going to do anything. He gave up.

"Okay, okay, I'm leaving! Raven, are you gonna be okay?" He was backing up towards the door.

"Just go! All of you! Get out! Leave me alone!" Raven was following him, cornering him against the door until their bodies were barely an inch apart. She was breathing heavily, shakily.

"You…can't…help me…" she whispered huskily, her chest moving in and out slowly with her breath.

Robin just stared at her for a moment.

"I can try."

With that, Raven backed up slightly, tears still running down her cheeks.

_Finally_, Robin thought. _She's okay now. Great. Now just talk to her; you can-_

His thoughts were interrupted by Raven screaming, "Get out!", and using her powers to move him literally through the door into the hall; the sound of a lock followed. Robin stood just outside the door.

"Raven, let me in. Raven? Raven! What are you doing!"

Raven stood just inside the room, facing the door, listening to Robin yell at her through the door. _'Let me _in_'? Yeah right. He can't help me. He can't do anything_, she though bitterly. She turned away from the door and headed toward her bed. _I could probably just sit here and wait until he breaks the door down. He probably will, if he keeps this up._

Robin pounded on the door with both fists, still yelling, "Raven! This isn't funny! Let me in!" What he thought Raven was doing he didn't know, but it couldn't be anything good.

As she walked toward her bed, Raven stopped in mid-step; something had caught her eye:

The Window.

For a moment, she just stared at it, as if in a trance. Then, slowly, she stepped toward it. When she stood only a few inches away from the window, she looked out at the city for a moment. _This is my home. I used to protect this place; I'll only destroy it if I stay…_

The question of 'should I go?' had been present in Raven's mind and soul since the day she was born. _I have my answer. I've made my decision: _

_It's not worth destroying all I've ever loved, just to live._

With that, she brought her hands together into a fist and began hitting the glass; shattering it until the entire frame was empty, except a few jagged pieces around the edges; and her hands and arms were cut and bleeding. She stood silently by the now empty window frame, feeling the breeze come into her room; staring out at the city that was so calm, so undisturbed and unaware of the turmoil of her thoughts.

_I don't care… I don't need to live anymore… I could jump right now… save more than a million lives… in one jump… the world would be saved…_ Morbid images and thoughts raced through her head, and she stood, unphazed, by the open frame. The blood starting to drip from her cuts.

_I really don't care… I don't need to live anymore… **But there may be a hope!**_ Suddenly, another voice seemed to jump into her thoughts. Hope. Her own hope that had helped bring her to stay before. _**There is **always **a chance! **_

Slowly, sanity streamed back into Raven's mind and body; flowing downward, like a waterfall. She drew in a sharp, almost pleased breath as she finally felt the pain in her arms and hands and felt the cold liquid running down them. She saw the sun start to rise beyond the towers and buildings of Jump City.

Just then the door flew open to reveal her fellow Titans standing with frantic expressions on their faces just outside her room. Robin had called Cyborg to open Raven's door via the Tower's computer system, and when Cyborg came, the other Titans followed, so they could see the little show Raven was putting on for them; suicidal as it was. The five stood frozen in the doorway until Beast Boy regained his voice.

"Uh, okay. Really feel like I missed somethin' here."

"Not now, Beast Boy," Robin said, starting to walk slowly towards Raven, as one would approach a small, frightened animal. When she didn't yell at him again, or much less do anything at all, Robin walked a little faster until he stood beside her.

"Raven?"

She turned her gaze from the window to Robin.

"Let me see your arm."

Obediently, Raven lifted her right arm, and Robin supported it gently and examined it, pulling pieces of broken glass out every so often.

He sighed, "God, Raven, why'd you do this to yourself…" This was more a statement than a question; it had no answer, anyway.

Raven still just stared, with a blank expression on her face, at her bleeding arm. Then she heard a muffled sob; she turned her head towards the door where Starfire stood, trembling slightly, covering her mouth with her hands, and crying because her friend would do such a horrible thing to herself. _On purpose_. Beast Boy and Cyborg stood beside her; Cyborg with his hand on Star's shoulder, trying to comfort her; Beast Boy just staring, jaw dropped slightly, at Raven. And the blood and glass all over her and scattered around the floor. Shocked. Of course they were. But Robin… Not Robin. Not showing it, anyway. A calm expression on his face as he stood beside his friend, his girlfriend, even, and picked the glass from wounds that she inflicted on herself.

A slightly jealous, yet wondering thought, _How does he do it?…_ passed through Beast Boy's mind. _Some boyfriend. He's more like her brother…_ (A/N: JEALOUS! WHOO HOO! Sorry, I couldn't resist: a little BbxRae can really help the suspense. Moo ha ha!)

(Raven as she's standing at the window ((broken window)), thinking about jumping)

Balancing Act

May I have you attention please

Attention please, and thank you

Thank you for joining us today

We are so joyed to see you

For our first act, the lion tamer

Bravest and the best

Of whom has gone way past the mouth

Much farther than the rest

Second, the levitation act

Mind, no strings attached

And then the wondrous disappearance

Minus every catch

And last but not least, the balancing act

Standing high upon a wall

That is when, you, audience

Count the seconds til she falls

We count until she hits the ground

And til they notice she is gone

We count the seconds that they cry

But we doubt that will be long

And if she lives we count the seconds

Til the time she dies

And if she's dead when she hits the ground

We'll count the hungry flies

The vultures, too, if they should come

The birds and dogs as well

And if my judgment is correct

We'll count her down to hell

We'll count the moments that he thinks

It didn't have to be this way

We'll count the seconds til he thinks,

'She'd have died anyway'

We'll count the minutes that they care

Then the years that they forget

Though to forget this marvelous balancing act

It hasn't happened yet

Raven doesn't really think her friends won't care if she kills herself; she just 'pretends' they wouldn't so she won't regret committing suicide. But in those moments of insanity, she thinks of all the bad possibilities that her death may cause: Hell, for example. And also, there's the thought of what if Trigon comes anyway and she's not there to even _try_ to stop him?

R&R! Bowan'arrowchick


	8. Deny Her

Chapter 8: Deny Her

He slammed his fist against the wall; breathing heavily, sharply. Intense frustration and fear coursing through him. The very air he breathed felt cold as glass.

"Why are you blaming me!" he yelled, turning to face the man that was practically his father.

"It's not your fault, Richard, but you could have prevented it."

"How could _I_ have stopped her from doing that? And-and stop calling me that!"

"Why shouldn't I call you that? It's your name. Given to you by your parents."

"Why are you doing this? Why are you acting like this? I came to you for help. I can't handle this by myself! She's trying to kill herself! What am I supposed to do? How is this _my_ fault!"

"One thing at a time, Richard. We're in no hurry."

"Hurry? Of course we are! Lord knows when she's going to try it again! If she hurts herself-"

"She won't. Not now; she's right outside," Bruce said, finally turning away from the great window spanning the room, facing Robin.

"That's not the point! I know she won't right _now_, I mean in general. There's no way I can stop this prophecy from happening, and I can't help her by myself. Why won't you help me!"

"Have you come to me for help, because if you have, you may have it?"

Robin sighed, turning away. "What help have _you_ to offer?"

He felt Bruce's hand on his shoulder.

"Whatever I did for you, I can do for her. Go get her now. Bring her in."

Robin walked to the end of Bruce Wayne's living room and opened a heavy, mahogany door.

"Raven, you can come in now."

The girl stood up, shakily, and began walking toward Robin, clad in a tux in order to seem somewhat formal around his former partner. Raven wore a spaghetti-strap, dark-blue dress that came to about mid-thigh; and black, high-heeled shoes that wrapped around the ankle. She walked over to Robin, who, like her, had a confused mixture of emotions displayed on his face.

She tried to smile, but she knew he wasn't looking at her face; just at the faint outlines of cut-marks on her arms. Luckily, none of the cuts had been deep enough to leave scars, except on the minds of those who had seen her that night.

Robin held out his hand to escort her in; she took it, but instead pulled him into a hug, letting him know for the thousandth time that she was alright; she was aware of what was going to happen; she could accept it now; she would fight; she would not spill her own blood again.

She was led into the living room, where through the large window the rainstorm outside was all the more acknowledged. Robin led her to the tall, somewhat unwelcoming man standing in the center of the room.

She shook his hand as Robin said, "Raven, this is Bruce Wayne. He's an old friend of mine."

Thunder boomed outside. Raven faintly smiled.

"Nice to meet you."

"Likewise." Bruce gestured to one of the black leather chairs behind her. She sat down, though the others remained standing.

"Now, is there anything you think I could do to help her, Richard?" he asked Robin, as if Raven weren't in the room. She glanced at Robin quickly, then at the ground. This man knew Robin's name.

"Anything you can do will be considered help," Robin answered, standing beside Raven with his hand on the arm of the chair.

"Very well. Miss Roth?"

Raven looked up at the man. He knew her name, too. Who was he? She tried to read his mind, but something seemed to stop her, whether it was merely his strong gaze or something else.

"Miss Roth, your lover has called upon me for help. I understand your situation, and I believe I may be of some help. You don't know who I am?" This was barely a question. Raven shook her head.

"Follow me."

"Batman! You took me to see _Batman_!" Raven yelled at Robin as they walked down the long driveway of the Wayne mansion.

"Raven, hush! Someone's gonna hear you!"

She scowled, crossing her arms. She started walking faster.

"Raven- Uh! Raven! Listen to me, he can help," Robin insisted as he matched his pace to hers and caught up with her.

"But why didn't you tell me?"

"At the Tower? Raven, I can never get you alone anymore; someone would've heard if I'd told you there."

"Why couldn't they hear? You trust them as much as me and-"

"Beast Boy. And probably Starfire, too. B's just too talkative to realize he's giving something away, and Starfire's too… well, clueless to realize it. But not in an offensive way."

Raven sighed. "But I'm quiet and dark, so you could tell me, right?"

"Well, you're quiet. And sensible, unlike the others."

They had reached the end of the drive. They walked through the tall, iron gates, which shut behind them, and mounted the R-cycle. As they passed through the 'slums' of Gotham City, Raven stopped him.

"Pull over for a sec."

Robin looked back at her, slowing down.

"Why?"

"Just do it."

Robin pulled up to the sidewalk in front of an old, run-down apartment building with a dark, litter-filled alley to the right; a rusty fire-escape on the same side.

"I'll be out in a minute," Raven said, getting of the motorcycle and walking toward the front door.

"What? What are you doing?" Robin followed her.

Raven sighed. "You can come if you want to, but you'll regret it."

Knowing it was no use protesting, Robin followed her up the steps to the front door of the building. He tried the door.

"It's locked."

Without saying a word, Raven sent a stream of black energy to the lock and mentally pushed the door open.

"Never mind…" Robin muttered, following Raven inside. In the back of the small entryway, there was an old flight of stairs, wooden and dusty; probably not very sturdy. Raven started to walk up them with Robin silent at her heels.

"Um, where are we going?" he asked as they reached the second floor.

"Quiet," Raven ordered and continued walking. She stopped at a door on the left side of the hall. She knocked on it, quietly. Robin noticed her hand was shaking.

Shuffling and muttering noises came from the other side of the door. The scraping back of a chair, someone moving. Finally, a man opened the door. He looked rather old; he wore faded clothing and a look of sheer unpleasantness on his face, which lasted only a second, for it morphed to surprise at the sight of Raven; though it snapped quickly to anger and irritation afterward.

"What the hell d'you want?"

"Are you ready to listen to me, you stubborn son of a bitch?"

The man grunted in response.

"Move aside," Raven ordered.

"Raven," Robin hissed. "What're you doing!"

"Shut up," she snapped, shooting Robin a death glare, then turning back to the man. "Move aside," she said again, stronger this time.

"I ain't doin' nothin', you God'amn witch."

"I'll stay out here all night if I have to. I'm coming in."

"You said that the last time. I 'member you. You's the one who's gone an' tried ta take my daughter's b'longin's."

"What?" Robin asked, completely lost.

"Her things are more mine than yours, and you know it. Let me through," Raven spat.

"Raven, what is going on?" Robin asked again anxiously, grabbing her by the shoulder and spinning her around to face him.

"Never mind!"

Robin looked as though he'd been smacked. Why was she acting like this?

"Ain't you one a' them Titans? Do your God'amn job an' get this trespasser off' a my doorstep. I don't know who she is or what she wants wi' me, but she won't let me alone. I ain't never seen her 'fore in my life."

"You just said you did, now move aside. What do you want with her things anyway? They aren't any good to you."

"Angela's things are precious to me. They're my only r'minder of my daughter."

"You mean the only evidence of what you did to her. I've been in that room before, you know; I've been in the scene of the crime. I know how she got out that night and why. I know what drove her to run away: you. You did. You drove her insane. You drove her out of this place and into a cult. You drove her to do what she did! You drove her to my father, and it's your fault I'm here! You're driving the world to its very death! It's your fault I'm here!"

Anxiously, Robin held Raven back as she tried to lunge at the man, whether just to get past him or otherwise; other inhabitants of the building opened their doors to see what was happening, but shut them quickly as they saw.

The man slammed the door as Robin dragged Raven down the stairs and out the door. Robin got her in front of him on the R-cycle and drove a good distance before pulling over again.

"Raven, what were you doing? Who was that guy?"

Raven was now breathing heavily, crying frustrated.

"Raven!"

"He's my mother's father!"

KK, sorry it's been so long since I last posted a chapter, I've been kinda depressed lately. I'm better now! J Yay! Anyway, any ideas? **R&R, give me suggestions!**


	9. Prepare Her

Chapter 9: Prepare Her

The rain had slowed to a light drizzle by the time Robin and Raven entered Titans Tower. The other Titans were sitting on the couch in the main room when they entered; they had been waiting for them. They knew Robin had taken Raven to someone who could 'help' her, but they didn't know _who_ this someone was.

It was silent when the two came into the room. Their friends were all on the couch; Beast Boy lazily channel surfing, Cyborg trying to fix their game station, and Starfire had fallen asleep on the sofa.

The boys looked up at the sound of the door.

"Hey. Any luck?" Cyborg asked.

Robin glanced at Raven, who had her arms crossed tightly in front of her, her eyes closed, and looked away from Robin, though he could still see the slow tears sliding down her face.

"She'll be fine," Robin replied finally, putting his arm around Raven comfortingly, pulling her close. He didn't care who saw; she needed him right now.

"Kay… so who exactly did you take her to see? Some kinda shrink? I mean, what she did in there was really-" Beast Boy stopped mid-sentence as he received death glares from Robin and Cyborg.

"I mean-"

"Forget it. I don't think she's listening," but Robin knew she was.

"Are you gonna be okay?" Not much of a question- _But I bet I know the answer…_

Robin stood in the hall with Raven outside her bedroom door. The tears were coming faster now as she shook her head.

"No." Her voice shook from crying. She still faced away from Robin. He lay his hands on her trembling shoulders and gently turned her to face him, though she still turned her head.

"Raven," Robin started, gingerly touching her face.

"Don't, Robin. Don't tell me you'll stop it because I know you can't…" she muttered in between sobs.

"I won't pretend anymore, Raven. I can't stop it. Not alone. But you can, and we'll help you."

Finally, she looked up at him. "Robin, I-" He hushed her, and she stepped closer to him.

"You are never alone, Raven. Look around you. We've always been there, and we'll still be there when and if that day comes."

Raven lightly kissed Robin beside his mouth.

"I am always there." By now, Raven was sobbing into his shoulder, though she was calming down.

"Robin, I love you," she said, her voice muffled by sobs.

"I love you too, Raven. And I always will."

"Robin," Raven said, looking up into his eyes.

"What? What is it?" Robin asked, a growing sensation of fear rising in him when he saw the look on her face. Her words were separated by sobs.

"Robin-the Prophecy-…"

"What? I couldn't hear the last part. What about the Prophecy, Raven? Raven?"

_Oh, dear God, help me! My father- "Robin, it's here."_


	10. Warn Her

Chapter 10: Warn Her

The Titans all sat in their usual spots on the couch in the living room. Cyborg was constantly checking the time, which showed up in red digital numbers in the panel on his left arm. Starfire was dozing slightly, and Beast Boy had already fallen asleep twice and was now drowning himself in caffeine to keep himself awake. Raven sat very close to Robin at the end of the couch; she was holding his hand in her lap to keep herself from fidgeting nervously.

The silence in the room was almost unreal. Like maybe there was noise, but they just couldn't hear it. The TV was off. No music was playing. Just the quiet, almost unconscious, anxious breathing; the kind when each breath feels like liquid titanium steel, cold, flowing. No one said a word. Just stared out the great window in front of them, occasionally glancing at one another. Except Raven and Robin; Robin wouldn't dare look away from the window, lest he miss the moment that Trigon made his grand entrance; Raven was looking down, unblinking. Squeezing Robin's hand every now and then, more to make sure they were still alive and not just dreaming the dream of a soul who only _thinks_ he's still living.

"We'll get through this, Raven. We've called for help," Cyborg said, the silence suddenly unbearable to him.

"They said they would think about it. They don't believe us," Raven answered, still not looking up.

"Oh, come on! When has the Justice League ever turned down a chance to be the headline? Whether they _believe_ you or not, why'd they turn you down!" Beast Boy demanded, somewhat twitchy from all the soda he had.

"They do not wish to become involved in such a… crisis…" Starfire said, finding no other explanation.

"She's right. Who would? After all, they aren't _on_ Earth now. They have that stupid fucking space headquarters. God damn it! Why didn't we think of that! Fuck this!" Raven said, suddenly helplessly angry; or upset, rather, since she had trained herself not to show anger. She had dropped Robin's hand and stood up now.

"Raven, please. Not now," Cyborg said tiredly, begging almost, his head in his hands.

Raven's eyes softened sadly. "Right. We shouldn't end on a bad note. It would suck to die being hated."

No one said anything to this, but Robin stood up wordlessly and wrapped his arms around Raven; she pressed her face into his chest, but did not cry. All this time, Robin's gaze hadn't left the window.

Thunder rumbled in the distance. Raven felt Robin's chest heave sharply.

"Batman," Raven muttered suddenly. "Robin, God damn it! Why didn't you get Batman to help us! Robin? Robin, cut it out for two minutes, please! He's not just gonna sneak into our dimension quietly, you'll know! It won't kill you if you tear your eyes away from outside for one fucking second!" Robin didn't move. "Fuck you! You God damn son of a bitch! Let-let me go!" Robin's grip had tightened around her. She struggled to escape his grasp to no avail. "What are you doing! Let go! Fuck you! Fuck you!" Raven's yells turned to sobs, and she helplessly buried her face in Robin's chest again.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I can't let this happen. I can't." Robin rocked her gently, keeping his own tears securely behind his masked eyes. If he cried, or showed it, there wouldn't even appear to be hope. "I can't let you die. Any of you. No one can die tonight. No one," Raven spoke more to herself than anyone, telling herself not to let it happen. Not to let him come.

_Dear God, keep him away… He can't come… He can't come… He won't… He won't… He won't…_ Thoughts meant to soothe the uneasy mind. They may have worked, too, if there had been any hope at all.

Just then, lightening struck in the distance, sharp and blinding; thunder seemingly striking at the same time, deafening; the room seemed to light up with great white light.

Don't look at the light… 

This repeated: lightening and thunder at the same time, causing a senseless, almost deathly feeling afterward. Numb…

One last time, lightening… thunder…

Robin finally spoke:

"Raven, it's hear."


	11. Kill Her pt II

Just a clarification:

_Thinking _

"_Telepathy"_

Chapter 11: Kill Her pt. II

Though it was thundering hard and lightening streaked the sky, there was little rain. Only a drizzle, but there were enough clouds to darken the sky and cool the air so it felt like ice against the Titans' skin. Shivering with both fear and cold, Raven walked behind Robin as they searched the city on foot. Not using the car or R-cycle, for they would make noise and maybe draw the attention a certain multi-dimensional demon. They were told not to make any noise, any sound at all. Barely breath, if they could help it. No footsteps on the deserted streets. Everyone was inside because it was so late. No one knew what was happening that night. With luck, they wouldn't have to, but that was clearly impossible. There would be no luck tonight.

Because Trigon was there, in the city. Raven could feel it, and she thought Robin could too. Starfire, perhaps, could sense him as well, being not of this Earth. Cyborg and Beast Boy, since they had been inside Raven's mind. But no one could taste the doom like Raven could. The taste of blood and death wasn't as familiar to the others as it was to her.

"_Robin, are you... alright?"_ _That's a stupid question... "Robin?"_

"_No. I'm not"_ Raven could tell he was trying to keep his 'voice' monotone, so as not to show much emotion (as Raven usually spoke), but he was failing miserably as fear and anger and worry were released in his words.

"_Robin, we'll be okay."_

"_No, we won't, Raven. There's no way we can make it out of this."_ Inside his own mind, Robin could not lie. He could not pretend there was a hope, for there was none.

"_I am so sorry, Raven."_

"_What? Robin, this isn't your fault. There's no way you could've prevented this. It's...destiny. _My_ destiny."_ Raven was now walking beside him. Robin continued to scan their surroundings for signs of a demonic presence.

"_Raven, I love you more than anything in the world. I'm sorry we have to end this way. I'm sorry it can't be stopped. And as much as I hate to admit it, you're right. There's nothing I can do."_

Tears welled in Raven's eyes._ "Robin, you're angry, I can tell; you're blaming yourself. Please, don't. Not now, not for anything, especially not this. I can't stop him from coming; he's already here. And I may not be able to send him back to wherever he came from, but I can try and stop him; and I _won't_ give up. I _won't_ give in to him. I won't be the end of this world, and neither will he."_

"_You're starting to sound like me."_ He smiled at her, or the closest thing to a smile Robin could manage at that particular place and time. _"Maybe that means there's a hope."_ The cold feeling of foreboding and just the air around her became less apparent as Raven looked into Robin's eyes, like she could see behind the mask. Like she always could, if she had ever tried.

"I love you, Raven," Robin said quietly; barely a whisper, but the only sound, it seemed, in the entire city. Then the lightening struck. And thunder. Raven jumped, gasping quietly.

"Oh my God..." she muttered, looking at the black, clouded sky. A deeper blackness was visibly rippling across the it. Dark, menacing. A sign. It spread in all directions, echoing hollowly in the back of Raven's head as visions of her destiny ran through her mind. The source of the ripples seemed to be directly above the Titans.

_He knows we're here.._

"Split up," Robin ordered. No one argued. They knew _He_ wasn't there for them.

"Robin-" Raven started to protest.

"Except you. Follow me, Raven." He seemed to be treasuring every time he said her name. Lord knows if he'd ever have another chance to. Everyone started in different directions. More blood-red visions seared Raven's thoughts as she followed Robin. She faltered slightly, dizzy; he steadied her. She knew what her father was doing; he was tempting her. Showing her what she could do, what she could become.

_Why can't you understand; I don't _want_ to be like you...!_

_...You don't have a choice_

Raven's scream caught in her throat. _He knows where we are..._

"Robin-"

"Shh!" Robin held out his hand to silence her. He was looking over to their left, in the direction of an alley. "Something's here."

The way he said 'something' instead of 'someone' wasn't exactly a comfort. Robin took Raven's hand and started toward the alley. They spoke under their breath.

"Robin, no!"

"Hush! Raven, wait here."

"No, Robin, it's my father we're dealing with; let me go, not you. I won't put you in any more danger."

For a moment, he didn't speak. Finally, he took her hand again and held it in his.

"Raven. Don't let anything happen to you."

Raven looked over his shoulder down the narrow, dark alley. "I'll be fine." _I wish I could say that for sure..._

Reluctantly she stepped toward the alley. She wished she'd stop shivering so she wouldn't seem so afraid; she didn't want to worry Robin. She knew he already regretted letting her go ahead of him.

The alley seemed fairly empty at first, at least of demons. Just a few trash cans, graffiti on the walls, barely visible in the dark. Then Raven heard a low grinding sound, like something heavy being pushed over a hard floor. Metal grinding against the concrete ground. What sounded like birds flying at a very high speed, whipping through the air, sounded behind Raven. She turned... And Robin was not there. The streets beyond the alley were empty. Of sound, of presence, of hope. Empty.

But the alley itself was not. The grinding noise quickened, though Raven couldn't yet draw her eyes from the deserted street behind her. Her thoughts seemed to stop completely, though her heartbeat accelerated mercilessly. The grinding became faster and louder by the second until it seemed to pierce her senses like needles, drawing her out of one shock and into a near paralysis. Perhaps it wasn't that it was loud, but the fact that it was the only sound in the city amplified the screeching grind. She unblinkingly turned to face the creator of the racket, hardly able to focus. But through her blurred vision she could still make out the one remaining blank-faced, metallic beast coming closer to her from the depths of the alley.

She could not move. She could barely breath. Her body was numb with cold and fear, and she couldn't feel her own tears streaming down her face, much less the normally searing pain creeping through her as the creature lashed out and hooked its claws deep into her shoulder; it began to drag her farther into the alley, the mind-splitting grinding of the thing combined with the sound of birds crowing, or rather cackling, ringing in the hollows of her subconscious mind.

A/N: Ha ha! Cliffhanger! Again... Anyway, I haven't replied to any of y'all who reviewed yet, so here (and sorry for the wait) :

**Jaime Snyder**: Hmmm... Could be. -bird flies up and lands on my shoulder- MOO HA HA!

**Tritium**: Thanks so much! ...and what's proverbial? Lol

**strwbrrydaquiri**: Lol. Thanks!

**neetfreek**: Hold your horses, I'll update when I have time. And it's called a cliffhanger. Lol, just kidding. And about the poem: awww, thanks soooo much!

**SugarDevil**: Yeah, tell me about it. Lol. Don't worry peoples, Rae'll get what she 'deserves'. -evil laughter-

**DarkWindingRose**: Thankies! And yeah, I wrote Balancing Act when I was being random and thinking of all the other Raven suicide poems I'd read. Just popped into my mind, and I used it in this fic. Kinda out of place, but whatever. Lol

**pkanimechic468**: Hey, Dais. Thanks, and well put, lol. And yeah, blood rocks -wink-

**Jurodan**: Thanks! Yeah, a lot of people get confused with the poems, so the explanation helps sometimes.

**KidFlashisHot**: Thanks! No they're not, I love your poems!

**Raven** **Roth7**: Heh heh, maybe a little too descriptive, but I couldn't resist -.

**Raven** **of** **The** **Shadows** **Azerath**: Ugh, thank you SO much for reviewing that poem. I was starting to eat myself 'cause everyone thought it was so confusing -rolls eyes- Oh well. Thankies! And great interpretation!

**Chica** **De** **Los** **Ojos** **Cafe**: Yeah, I write the poems -beams- Thank you so much! Glad you like them! Lol, yeah the first chappie was a little detailed, but oh well, it got people interested. -wink-PS: I LOVE your pen name! Awesomeness!

**Taraakatraitor**: Thanks, I try. lol. And yeah, I was lacking in suspense toward the beginning of the story, but hopefully I'm making up for it with all the ridiculous cliffhangers lol!

**dark16angel**: Aw, thanks. Yeah, talk about your kodak moments; girl has a hole through her face, can't move anything but her head, hot guy walks in and kisses her. Yeah, this is what happens when I'm bored. lol

**KidFlashisHot**: "That's so sweet! And yet, SO amazingly sad! I really hope she doesn't die! Oh god, she won't die, she's Raven!" you wrote. Hmm... we shall see... -evil laughter... again-

**Zerath**: Yeah, I kinda rushed through the first few chapters. Had to get it all out there before I could really start with the real story -wink- Thanks!

**And** **FOREVER**: Lol, love the pen name.

**Zerath**: Thanks so much! Yeah, I tried to find at least SOME depth within these characters... actually wasn't that hard to find what with all the crap they've each been through (except for Starfire; she'll get over her sister betraying her people thing, that's crap, lol) RobxRae all the way (tis my motto), check the profile for further refferences and ramblings -winks-

A/N: Thank you all SO much for reviewing! Loves, always!

Inevitably,

Morbid Original


	12. Kill Her pt III

**Chapter 12: Kill Her pt. 3**

"_Let me in, little bird."_

The sound of her father's sonorous voice echoed in her numb mind. Like a zombie, Raven's eyes were fixed straight ahead of her as her captor dragged her through alleys and streets until they reached the very heart of the city. From above the mainstreet square, the dark ripples across the sky were sourced, the four glowing eyes of Trigon looking down on his daughter.

"_Let me in, little bird,"_ he repeated, his permanent glare glowing a deeper red and the metal creature digging its claws deeper into Raven's shoulder.

She winced slightly, blinking herself into awareness. "You – you can't be here. You don't belong here," she stammered half-consciously.

"_Neither do you. Neither of us need this inferier world. Put it out of its misery. _Letmein_."_

Raven fought off her father's presence in her mind desperately. Her lifesblood pouring out, forming a pool where she stood. The saltwater from her tears stinging her wounds. The creature turned to her, still partially embedded in her arm, and clutched her face in his other claw, drawing her up to him.

"_Let. Me. In."_

"NO!" Raven finally screamed, conjuring what little strength she had and jerking away from the beast, pulling free. She shrieked in pain, hardly able to breathe over her sobs.

_It's the end of the world._

She fell down in a puddle of what she thought, at first, was rain, but found it was her own blood. She rolled over and vomited, sick to her stomach thinking – no, _knowing_ – that there was nothing left to do. But she had to resist. She had to fight.

"I won't let you come," she said lowly but fiercly, gritting her teeth against her pain and squeezing her four eyes shut.

"There is nothing you can do. If you do not let me enter this realm, you will die trying to keep me out."

Raven again tried to push him out of her mind. She panted, but stood and faced the sky.

"If that's what it takes."

Then another presence joined her father's in her mind. A helpless, lifeless specter seeming to scream out at her.

'_Raven!'_

She gasped, blinking the shock of such a sudden blast of energy away with her presently two eyes.

"Robin!"

The cawing and flapping of birds sounded behind her, and the beast once again clamped into her as she stood frozen in place.

"_There is more at risk than _your_ life if you don't let me come."_

'Raven! Don't do it! It's better me than the whole world, Raven!' Robin shouted.

Tears, again, came to Raven's eyes, and she hung her head, wishing more than ever that she would just die. "...But... you _are_ my world, Robin..."

A dark, swirling portal formed, no larger than a quarter now, in front of her, growing until it filled the square.

She choked back her cry. "Just don't hurt him, please," she begged quietly, and the creature released her, backing away from the gradually emerging portal. For one second, the familiar red eyes glowed on its face, then in the blink of an eye, it vanished; only a small, black raven remained. Dead. Its purpose searved.

The unavoidable thought raced through Raven's head: _That's going to be me. Just another stone-cold, lifeless raven lying dead in the street._

A soft thud sounded behind her. She turned back to face the portal and was knocked out-cold as a compelling lifeforce emerged. Awaking, Raven lay on the street looking upward. The eyes in the sky were gone. She tried to recall what had happened and remembered, a scream catching in her throat. Her weeping continued, the picture of Robin lying bloody and still, in front of the portal, with claw marks all over him clear in her mind.

"Raven."

Raven shut her eyes and covered her ears desperately. "No... no... you're not really there. Stop it, Trigon! Stop it, it's not fair! You can't torture me like this! You can't-"

"Raven," Robin clambered over to where she lay, collapsing beside her.

"Robin?" Raven rolled over to face him, her tone disbelieving and amazed. "Robin! You're-" she couldn't very well say 'okay;' the boy was covered in gashes and blood (both Raven's and his own); "-alive!"

He groaned in reply.

Raven put her hand on his chest and started to heal him, but he pushed her off. "Not me," he panted. "Save it...I'll be fine..."

An earsplitting blast of sonic light and the ever discordant shrieking of demonic birds sounded nearby. Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy emerged from the flame and darkness and crossed over to them in the square.

"Are you guys-" pause, "-alive?" Beast Boy asked unsurely.

Robin and Raven glanced at each other briefly. "Good question," Raven sighed, pushing herself to a sitting position.

"Friends, your city is in much disorder," Starfire said, then kneeled next to Raven. "Might there be a way to stop the Trigon?" she asked.

Raven looked down. "I don't know. Nothing that's been tried so far has worked. I don't think he's even been banished before." She sighed. She stood and gazed tearfully at the ruins of the city. "I'm sorry this had to happen."

"Raven," Cyborg said gently, stepping toward her; "You can't blame this on yourself. Even you said it was inevitable." He lay his hand on her shoulder.

Raven choked back the lump in her throat. "But – if I hadn't come here, it-"

"No. Friend Cyborg is right," Starfire said as she and Beast Boy helped Robin up. She came over to Raven. "This is not your evil we are dealing with. It is the Trigon's, and his behavior is not your fault," she assured.

Raven swallowed. "No, you don't _understand_! If I had never come to Earth, then Trigon would have had no way of getting here-"

"And you would still have been in Azarath, and you would have been lost there in its destruction," Robin said.

Raven quieted for a moment, trying to steady her breathing. "_I don't care about _my_ death_. _But the_ Earth_. He wouldn't have destroyed the Earth_." Raven sighed. "It could've been saved..."

For a while, no one spoke.

"Raven." Robin came up to her, looking her in the eye. To Raven's surprise, he reached up to his face and removed his mask, revealing deep brown eyes. "Look at me," he told her, though she couldn't have looked away if she'd tried. "I would have sacrificed the very Earth itself to have known you."

She just stared at him, his expression oddly serene, and then fell into his arms. He held her to him tightly.

"You have to know that this isn't your fault. You didn't have a choice. It was your destiny."

Raven flinched at the word and hugged Robin tighter.

"Pure and simple. And who knows, Trigon may have found a way to Earth even without your help. And then we really wouldn't stand a chance."

Raven pulled back slightly and looked up into his eyes. "Y-you're going to fight?" she choked out, unbelieving.

"Well, yeah," Robin said lightly, smiling at her. "How else are we gonna save the world?"

For some reason, a smile spread over Raven's face as she looked at each of her friends.

"You guys really think we can beat Him?"

Cyborg shrugged. "Worth a try."

"Yes. And if we should fail, perhaps we would not depart this world alone," Starfire suggested gingerly.

Raven was silent for a moment, then slowly stood.

"Alright. We need a plan," she conceded.

**A/N: Wow, an update after a good year or two...SORRY! I really, _really_ hate this show, and it's going to take all my will (or lack thereof) to finish this fic; but as it's said, the author writes not for herself, but for her audience. In other words...**

**THIS IS ALL FOR YOU, BITCHES!  
****Thank you.  
****-In Mercy-  
****Morbid Original**


	13. Save Her

**Chapter 13: Save Her**

"Sounds good. Okay, let's go," Robin said and broke the huddle. The team started away from the square. They didn't have much information to base a real plan on, so they were mostly going to have to improvise. This made the teammates a little edgy, but none of them showed their doubts.

"Raven, up here," Robin ordered. Raven jogged to catch up with him and walked with him in front of the group. "Any idea where your dad may be hiding?"

The pulsing in the sky had stopped, and the eyes had disappeared, so Raven assumed Trigon had already entered their dimension.

She shook her head.

Robin sighed. "Great. We'll have to start from scratch then."

Raven looked down sadly. Suddenly, a thought came to her. "Wait!"

They stopped walking.

"What is it?" Cyborg asked.

Raven pondered something for a moment then took off down an alley. "Follow me!"

The others exchanged confused glances and ran after her. She came to a stop in front of an old, decrepit church. Raven looked up at it.

"This is it," she said finally.

"What's it?" Beast Boy panted, catching up to her.

"This is the 'church' my mother ran away to a long time ago. It was because of a satanic cult of women that she was impregnated with me in the first place. She was sacrificed to Trigon," Raven said.

Robin surveyed the area, not seeing much out of the ordinary. Then his eyes stopped on the street sign. "This is 3rd Street. The number three is the Devil's number, isn't it?"

Raven nodded. "It's used as a mockery against the Holy Trinity." She paused. "What time is it?"

Cyborg glanced at the digital clock section of his left arm. "Almost 2:50 AM. Why?"

Suddenly, lights came on in the church and a soft humming noise arose. Soon words could be made out, as the chanting grew louder:

"_We calleth upon thee, Father of Darkness, Father of Peril, on this thy holy night of coming!"_

"They're calling to him," Raven said lowly. Then louder, as fear rose in the back of her throat, "They're summoning him! We're running out of time!"

Without a second thought, she bolted up the steps to the double doors, nearly ripping them off their hinges with her aura.

"Raven, wait!" Robin called, as the rest of the team started up the steps after her. Raven remained in the doorway, surveying the vast chapel she had entered. At first glance, it looked like a normal church, a pristine hall of echoing marble and stained glass. But looking closer, the painted ceilings and windows depicted images of the horned demon Trigon, the destruction of Azarath, and...Raven gasped. The rape of her mother. The prophecy.

"Dude...what's going on in here," Beast Boy asked, standing just outside the chapel with the others.

Robin shook his head slowly. "I don't – Hey!"

Raven whirled around. The doors had slammed shut, locking in place. She ran to them, calling her spell over and over and finally resulting to slamming against the doors with her fists. It wouldn't budge. She could hear the team struggle to open them on the other side as well.

"Raven!" Robin called, making her heart sting. "Raven! Hold on! We'll find another way in!"

Behind her, the candles flickered as an icy breeze whistled through the room. Raven turned around slowly, her heart beating rapidly against her chest_. She was supposed to do something_...But how did she know that? Coherent thought seemed to cease as she looked around the room again. There were rows of unoccupied pews before a dusty cross and an alter lit up with candles. That alter... Placed in the center of the black tallow candles was...a jar – no, a vase. A dull bronze vase with a curved handle.

Raven walked slowly up the center aisle towards it, feeling as though a force _other_ than her own was causing her to move. But it was comforting, somehow. Warm...Maternal, almost. With each step, she felt lighter, and as she was ascending the steps before the alter, it seemed she had no weight at all.

Four eyes glared at her enticingly from the vase.

* * *

Robin jammed his bow-staff against the bottom of a window at the back of the church, attempting to pry it open. He threw it down fruitlessly. The chanting was growing louder and the smell of smoke filled the air.

Cyborg swore as rammed his entire weight against the wall for the umpteenth time. It seemed to leave no effect.

"Damn! What is this place made out of?" he yelled incredulously.

Beast Boy tried the same approach as a rhinoceros, then multiple dinosaurs, as Starfire rained down at the building with fireballs. Beast Boy morphed back into human form.

"We need a new plan."

The Tamoranian girl nodded. "It seems this place is being protected by a powerful force. More powerful...than us," she added solemnly.

Robin grit his teeth, looking around for another idea. Time was slipping away from them. Smoke now covered the blackened sky.

The smoke...

"The roof!" The four Titans looked skyward. Smoke was billowing up from the top of the church building. "It's the sacrifice," Robin said, breathless with the realization.

"But who're they –" Beast Boy began, but stopped. Robin felt his heart drop to his stomach as his eyes met his friend's.

"No..." Cyborg muttered, wide-eyed.

Robin looked to the roof again, eyes watering from the smoke.

"Raven...!"

* * *

She held her lips against the cool metal and drank, pouring every last drop of the water down her throat. She felt her breath leave her as her body became numb as a corpse. Then a clock chimed three times from somewhere within the church, and a hooded form appeared in the dark alcove.

"Hello, my dear. Can I help you?" the woman asked, her voice a near spell in itself.

Raven just turned to her, chest moving slowly with her breathing. The woman offered her hand, and Raven took it. She led her to the wall where an open door revealed a candle-lit staircase. Wordlessly, the two ascended, the green-cloaked woman smiling knowingly at her, hungrily. She opened the door at the top, and smoke immediately filled the chamber. Raven held her breath.

The scene before her was familiar. An open roof paneled with tall candles and many more of the green-hooded women, holding tallow candles of their own. The sacrificial fire burned in the center of it all, surrounding a narrow stone platform.

Raven stepped forward and allowed the woman to remove her clothes. The chiming of the clock echoed up from the church, and Raven stepped over the flames and lay down on the cold stone; the woman draped her cloak over her bare skin, then joined the others in a circle around the slab, chanting at the top of their voices until the fiery red eyes appeared in the sky directly above them.

Raven swallowed, her lip quivering.

_...I know...I know what I have to do..._

"RAVEN!"

The cry never reached her ears. Raven propped herself up on one elbow as a sole, silent tear ran down her cheek. She reached her arm skyward towards the eyes.

A force that seemed to flatten her with the weight of the world fell from the sky, and her vision turned red as Trigon was upon her.

"_Now!"_

With a rush of strength, Raven sat up, screaming.

"_**NO**!_"

For a fleeting second, time seemed to stop, then reverse, as the demonic aura rose and was sucked from the dimension by a power apparently greater than it. The fires blew out, and the smoke disappeared as if it had never existed. The Titans were alone on the rooftop.

Raven fell back against the stone slab, not conscious of having a body any longer. She felt her soul become a tangible thing, and she could almost hear the uplifting voices of her mother and all of Azarath. Tears streamed down her face, but she was happy.

"Raven!" The other Titans stood frozen near the edge of the roof, and she heard someone run toward her and lift her. Her sight was fast leaving her now. "Raven..." The familiar voice. "You did it, Rae...You did it. You stopped him."

Raven felt herself being moved as he sat down on the platform, holding her. As she leaned back against him, she could feel his heart beating heavily against his chest. He held her hand to his face, and she felt his tears.

_Robin_...

"No...No, Raven! No, you can't d-" He couldn't say it.

_...I'm dying...?_

"No. Raven, no! Please, Raven, hold on! You can't go...You can't go...I won't let you, Raven."

Slowly, the last of her vision blurred until all the colors were mixed, all shapes contorted and bent, and everything was a confused blur. Her ears were ringing, and she felt her tears sliding down her neck and back, cold as ice water.

The last thing she heard.

"I tried to save you, Raven..."

* * *

She felt herself smile.

"_Robin..You did."

* * *

_

A/N: Oh. My. GOD!!! I updated!! Surprise, surprise :3 It's been a few years since I started this fic, and it's been about a year since I've watched Teen Titans...I'm sorry if my writing style has changed dramatically...

I started writing this chapter...probably halfway into the fic lol XD As soon as I got an idea for the end, anyway. So the last little portion of this chapter – just the little section where Raven is with Robin on the slab – was written back then. Everything else in this chapter was written..today.

:D

So yeah. Yay, I finally _finished something!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
_Well, almost.  
Drum roll...EPILOGUE!!! Soon. :D  
Thanks for all of you who stuck with me during the tedious writing of this fic!!!  
-Morbid Original-  
(Damn, I even went through two pen names while writing this XD)


	14. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

**

* * *

**

Robin stood up, wiping his brow with his arm, and looked out over the horizon of Jump City. The sun was setting across the river, the calm water reflecting the same vibrant orange as the sky above it. Robin tossed his shovel to Cyborg, announcing that he was going to head back now. His friend nodded, then turned back to help the others load a truck with bags of trash and rubble that the horrible storm from a week before had caused.

The city was slowly shaping up again. Already much of the ruins had been cleared away, and though they were running out of room at the city dump, some of the larger remains had been launched into space, courtesy of Starfire. The Tameranean flew past at that moment, carrying a tree that had been uprooted over her shoulder and humming. She nodded to Robin and smiled as he passed, as did many of the citizens who had volunteered to help rebuild the city.

Robin walked steadfastly on, regarding their work. Main Street was almost cleared of wreckage, and a green ox pulling a cart of debris and garbage headed up the street towards the dump. Titans Tower seemed to glow in the sunset. It had gone mostly unharmed, surprisingly, during the entire attack, almost like something was protecting it.

As the common room doors slid open before him, Robin's eyes were at once drawn to the dark form silhouetted against the window. Raven turned around as he entered, a soft smile on her face beneath shining eyes.

"You're up," Robin said, sounding slightly amazed, as he came to her side.

Raven leaned against him as he wrapped an arm around her waist, sighing.

"Yeah. I couldn't stay lying down anymore. A week is long enough," she said, turning back to the window.

They were silent for a moment. Robin laid his chin on her shoulder, following her gaze.

"They didn't think you'd be walking so soon," he said.

To his surprise, she gave a deep, quiet laugh. He turned to her questioningly and found her eyes were shimmering with dampness, still staring out the window.

"Come on, Robin. You underestimate me," she teased, smiling before she could stop herself.

Robin laughed and placed a kiss on her cheek, giving her a gentle squeeze as he embraced her. He leaned his head against hers as they both turned back to the skyscrapers beyond the window, which gleamed brilliantly in the setting sun.

* * *

A/N: Woo hoo! She's alive! And it's OVER!!!

Thank you all so much for sticking with it over these past, oh, two years. --" Sadly, I'm serious. Sorry for the wait! Y'know how things get, with obsessions.

This may seem a bit anti-climactic, as most epilogues are (Seriously, didja read Harry Potter 7?), but whatever. Sorry. I tried to accentuate (in this tiny amount of space) how amazing it seemed to Raven that the city was actually still standing after all that had happened – which was supposed to have been the end of the world. It's kind of unclear whether the citizens of Jump City are aware of what actually happened or if they think it was just some misfortune of nature (tornadoes, tsunamis) that destroyed their city. Either way.

Again, thanks so much to all the reviewers and readers! I do not own Teen Titans, and if I did, I would have sold it to someone more worthy by now (lol).

And YAAY!

Always,  
Morbid Original

(I can't believe I finished a fic:3)


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